The First Week

Well, I made it through my first week of being a real teacher.  And it was fun.  For the most part.  Tiring, but fun.  I haven’t blogged in a while, so I’m just going to do a little update on what has been going on in my life since August.  It may be a long blog lol.

So the first week in August, I ended my job at the lake (which made me so sad.  I love working there, and I miss everyone a TON, but I’ll still have summers off to come back J) and I taught a band camp in Michigan.  It was such a great week up there!  I always love being able to work with Mr. Ernst because he was such a great teacher for me, and I get to observe how he maintains such a great band program.  This year was especially good for me, because Mrs. Dutcher, my fantastic elementary music teacher, was working there, too, so I spent a lot of time just picking her brain and prepping for my own classroom.  I got a lot of great advice, and it was nice to get some questions answered.  After I left band camp, April and I went to Beckah’s wedding, which was really nice.

Two days after that, Colleen, Danyne and I packed our cars and came to Illinois to move me in.  Colleen and I spent the week unpacking some of my stuff and more importantly, cleaning and decorating my classroom.  It was pretty messy to begin with.  We took everything off the shelves and wiped EVERYTHING down.  We moved the desks and cleaned out the drawers.  I cleaned out a cabinet and found a box full of rhythm instruments, which was SUPER nice, because I didn’t know that I had any instruments at all.  Then we began the fun part: decorating!  My classroom still looks a little plain, but I figure as I keep teaching, I’ll get more things to decorate with.  My parents got to my apartment with all my furniture late Thursday night, so we unpacked the truck on Friday and set up the beds, couches, etc.  They helped me unpack for the next few days.  It was really nice to have them here to help, and when they left on Sunday night, it was pretty weird.

Monday was my 23^rd birthday.  And my first year teacher mentoring day.  It was kinda like as soon as I turned 23, real life started.  Mentoring day was not as long and boring as I expected it to be.  And the teachers there knew it was my birthday and even brought a cake to help celebrate.  It was really nice.  Then Shauntia came over to my house, we went to dinner in Watseka, then I dyed her hair.  I learned that if the teaching thing doesn’t work, I can open a hair salon in my kitchen.  Tuesday, I don’t think I did anything too important.  Wednesday was the teacher institute day.  I met a lot of the teachers, and there was a lot of info that was given out.  Kinda overwhelming, but I learned a lot.

Thursday was the first day of school.  Music is in the afternoon, so I didn’t teach anything (it was a half day), but I did help in the kindergarten room in the morning and then worked on my room/lesson plans in the afternoon.

Friday was MY first day of teaching.  It went alright.  I think that everything went ok with the exception of kindergarten.  I had all my plans and everything, but they lose attention REAL quick.  And 35 minutes is a LONG time for kindergarteners.  Especially on their first FULL day of school, by the afternoon, they are pretty much done.  But I sucked it up and ended the day really well.

And this week was pretty good.  Monday and Tuesday were a little bit rough.  Not that they were bad, by any means, there were just times that could have gone better.  But by today, I felt like things were starting to finally calm down.  They tell you in all your ed classes that the first stage of being a teacher is survival mode.  And I knew that, but I never really felt like I understood exactly what they meant until this week haha.  I feel like even student teaching can’t prepare you enough for your own classroom.  Don’t get me wrong, I learned a TON while I was student teaching, but in your ST experience, you still have your teacher to help you when you are drowning.  In your own classroom, you have to fight your way back to the surface.  Kind of a weird analogy, but it works.

Anyway, I really love working out here so far.  The other teachers are so nice and helpful, and because it’s a small school, I’ve gotten to know a lot of the kids.  I love that I get hugs every morning and throughout the day as they come into music every day.  And I love that I feel like I’m actually teaching them new concepts and they are enjoying it.  And I’m not doing anything particularly difficult, either.  Just getting the instruments out gets them super excited. 

Anyway, it’s been a really great week so far, and I’m really excited for the year.   And tomorrow is my first weekend at home being a teacher.  So I’m throwing a party? Haha.  I made a bunch of food tonight, so anyone who is coming should be excited, because I’m a good cook.   I’ll try to keep everyone updated on here, but no promises as to how often that will be.

Weekend

So this weekend was a pretty darn good one.  In an unexpected way.  I went down to Olivet on Friday night for a variety of reasons... apartment shopping, signing the Donovan contract, and my favorite reason, to hear the CSO play Mahler with the boys.   O yea, and to see my sisters ;)  Anyway, I had called a couple of places earlier in the week about apartments/housing situations and finally found one that wouldn't charge me through August and was cheap and nice, too.  (Sidenote, I know that I can find an apartment in Bourbonnais, but I had really wanted to live out closer to Donovan so that I could [one] not pay a fortune of time and money driving back and forth to work everyday and [two] somewhat cut the Olivet umbellical cord.  My parents reeeeeally wanted me to live IN Donovan, but I assured them that there was NOTHING in Donovan, and the closest place was 20 minutes away.)  So I had planned to go on Saturday morning to look at this place.  The guy I talked with made it sound like it was going to be a done deal kind of thing, I just needed to call Saturday morning before I came out and then the rest would be history.

Saturday morning, I get up and dressed and call the guy at 9AM.  His wife answers the phone... "I'm really sorry, hon, but we filled it yesterday.  I'm so sorry.  Really.  Sorry."  Yep... Sure.  So I was kinda really bummed about that, but decided that I should try to look at some other apartments while I was down there.  I look on the webpage and the first listing I see (it HAD to have been listed overnight, because I checked it Friday and it was NOT there) was in Donovan.  Before I even had time to think, I was calling the number.  He said that I should just come out and see it that morning.  So, less than an hour later, I was in Donovan in this apartment.  It was really great!  2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, office, large living room, kitchen, dining area, a yard, laundry room... everything was completely renovated before the last tenant, who lived there less than a year.  Brand new appliances, new carpet, new wood laminate flooring in the kitchen, new washer and dryer, new paint, everything.  It was MORE than what I expected of it!  Anyway, I end up filling out the application and leaving Donovan praying that everything would work out.  It still was kind of a gamble simply because I don't want to pay for June and July rent when I won't be there...

Sunday was a fantastic day.  No matter what it may have seemed, I was honestly very excited to spend the day with my boys. And apparently Patrick was excited to spend the day with Ian and I because he picked me up an hour and a half earlier than expected.  So we decided to waste some time eating Rolo flurries at 10 AM, and then hanging out in the parking lot of the train station.  We rode the train to Chicago and then had lunch together at Bennigans (duh).  After lunch we went to Symphony Center and climbed allllll the way to the gallery and got our second row seats to watch their last performance of the season until Ravinia.  We were a bit excited.  And it was Mahler.  So we were really excited.  And Haitink was conducting.  So we were really, really excited.  We watched them all warm up on stage (of course I was fixed on Dale...) and I kind of had a strange realization.  I realized that I would never perform like that.  I used to go to the CSO and think "someday, that will be me... (maybe not the CSO, but something along those lines)"  and get really excited to play my horn.  This time it was different.  I have somewhat given up on that part of my life.  And I realized it.  And I got really sad.  I mean REALLY sad.  Like... crying.  A lot.  Before the concert even started.  It was the worst feeling in the world.  Then the CSO began to play.  Beginning with a beautiful horn solo, and even better solos as the piece played on.  The fourth movement was by far my favorite.  Absolutely beautiful.  I cried during that, too, but only because it was so moving to me.  After the concert got done, we went to go get on the train home and we realized we had another hour and a half to kill.  So we went to the Chicago Art Festival.  Looked at some stuff.  Expensive stuff.  Then we walked along the river for a while and just got to talk and be friends.  It was nice.  I've missed those times with them :)

This morning, I didn't really have any plans other than to go sign some papers for Donovan.  I don't really know why I was expecting it to be a quick trip, because there was a LOT of stuff to go through and sign.  I literally sat and signed papers for an hour.  Yikes.  It was good though.  I learned a lot about the stuff I have to do, and even learned that I was getting paid almost $1000 more than I had been budgeting for.  Good news!  THEN I had to go get fingerprinted.  In the county jail.  I had never been in a jail before, and I NEVER want to be in one again.  It was just soooo.... I don't know.  Something I am glad I have not had the pleasure of experiencing before.  Anyway, did the fingerprinting and returned the paperwork back to Donovan and began the long drive home.  I realized that I love country roads in Illinois.  No cars, no hills, no turns, no speed limit ;) haha.  As soon as I got on 65, I get a call from the guy who owns the apartment.  We talked for a little bit and he was really nice.  Went to Michigan State, and was glad I was a teacher and all that stuff... he offered me the apartment.  And he even brought up the moving in August thing... "Here's what I can do... I won't charge you rent until August with the condition that the deposit is paid at the contract signing, and if you back out, its non refundable"  Um... yes please!  I don't have to pay the next two months, and I only lose if I back out?  I'm NOT backing out. So I can do that!  I told him I would take it and he said he would email me the contract.   I now am fully employed and have the apartment!  Full nights sleep... here I come!!!

Anyway, God really showed his provision for me this weekend.  First in getting me this job, and then in finding sucha great apartment.  I was really unsure about some of my life's decisions I had been making, but now I can see that this is where God wants me to be.  It has to be.  He would not have allowed things to work out this smoothly if it weren't where I were supposed to be.  I don't know WHY He wants me here, but I have a peace about taking this job.  Am I nervous?  Of course!  But I know that its where I am supposed to be, and if I have learned anything in the past 6 months, its to trust that God's plans are bigger than what we can see ourselves.

sex ruins everything.

yes.  it does.  when you have sex outside of marriage, it. ruins. EVERYTHING! and not just intercourse, but fooling around, too!  i don't care who you are or how much you think it won't affect you.  it does.  and it affects other people, too.  Seriously, I don't know how people can live like this and think it doesn't affect them.  if i think about what it would be like to have a loving spouse (or even a fiance, because you really should know these things BEFORE you tie the knot), fully committed to me, and to have to tell them that i slept with someone, or fooled around with someone, or whatever... that would KILL me to have to tell them.  and from the opposite side, if i had to hear that my fiance had done this kind of stuff with someone else, it would seriously ruin everything.  i think every time we even kissed from that point on, in the back of my mind, all i would be able to think about is how someone else had part of what was meant for me.  what was supposed to be mine and mine alone.  i know that forgiveness is supposed to happen, and i believe that you can forgive a person for these things.  however, people don't forget stuff.  and it creates distance and space in a relationship that is supposed to be an unbreakable, united, HOLY union.  I just wish people could see the full spectrum of consequences to their actions before they decided to "live in the moment."  Yea, you might be living in the moment now, but that one moment is going to follow you for the rest of your life.  Wouldn't you rather live in the moment with a person that you know will love you forever and that will always be there for you, and that only experiences sex with YOU?  Because then you don't have to think about the others.  You could focus on the one person that God gave to you.  As a GIFT.

I know I would...

My second thought for this blog is a little bit more personal (sorry).  Lately, I've been hearing a LOT of stories about people's actions with sex (outside of marriage), alcohol and other things that I have always considered to be not welcome in my life.  It seems that EVERYONE has made poor choices concerning these issues, and I have recently realized how sheltered I truly am from these kinds of things.  I literally have NO past with any of that stuff.  And satan really started making me question my decision to abstain from all this.  I mean... I'm 21 now, so what if I were to drink a little?  I could totally handle it.  Even the best of people drink sometimes, right?  And what about the whole dating thing?  It doesn't really matter if I date around while waiting for God's best, right?  What if my standards in finding a guy really are too high?  Is there a guy out there that has remained pure?  Is there someone that doesn't drink?...... And a lot of other similar type thoughts were rolling around in my head.  And this weekend, I just have had enough.  I KNOW that I dont need to experience these things to fit in with the people who have experienced them.  God can use me WITHOUT a checkered past.  I don't need to be stained by the world.  And as far as finding a husband when my standards are "ridiculously high and irrational?"  God placed these standards in my heart as a young girl, and I KNOW that there IS someone that holds to the same faith and values and standards and beliefs that I do.  If there isn't, then I don't need to be dating/marrying anyone anyways, because anyone less would just be bringing me down.


Anyway.... DON'T HAVE SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE!!!!  Think about the consequences.

Today was a GREAT day!

If I were in a Dr. Bell class, my “good things” for today would be the following:

1. Got to see my grandma Pat
2. Got a job offer
3. Accepted the job offer
4. Completed my teacher certification in Illinois
5. Finally unpacked all my stuff…
6. Made the parents “so proud”
7. BEAUTIFUL drive to Indian Lake
8. Listened to Grandma Helen play the piano
9. Had a nice talk with Grandpa George

And tonight… hopefully will be the first of many GOOD night’s sleep!

I am so blessed :)

 

My Wish

So my whole life, I’ve been the type of person that wants everyone I love to be in one place.  I remember as a five year old in kindergarten being asked if I could have one wish granted, what would it be?  My response:  that my grandma and grandpa and uncles and aunts and cousins from Charlevoix AND Perry could all live in a giant dome together with me and I would never have to be without one or the other.  I wanted nothing more than for us to be together all the time.  And tonight, as a 22 year old college graduate, I find myself wishing for the same thing.  I want all of my family from Perry and Charlevoix and Indian Lake and Bourbonnais to all be in one place (and yes, you know who you are that I consider family J).

As I drove home on Sunday morning after graduation, I found myself crying as I got on the entrance ramp.  It just hit me that I wouldn’t be coming back.  It was the last time I would make that drive home (with everything I own) for the summer.  I mean, I know I will see my friends again, but it will be very different.  It sounds so cliché, but that is how it is.  And it really sucks to think about.  Anyway, I don’t even really know why I’m writing this, other than I’m sad and I want my family in one place.

I miss you!

To my dear friends...

Just a few words about some people who have affected my life while at Olivet.

·         Phil DeYoung – So one time when I was in 8^th grade, you played right before me at Celebrate Life and scared me half to death.  I wanted so badly to come to Olivet and play horn with you, and was so mad that it didn’t happen that way.  But now, more than ever, I appreciate the way things are.  You are sometimes the only person that knows how I have felt many times this past year, and I am so thankful that you have been there to talk to.  I will never forget the conversation we had during band camp about why we play the horn.  That single conversation has affected me more than you know, and I thank you for that.  I also appreciate that your honesty with people.  You are never harsh, but you never let people get away with things they shouldn’t.  It’s a quality that I very much respect in you.

·         Shauntia Mettlin – TIA!!!  You were the first person I met at Olivet, and will probably be the last person I talk to before I leave after graduation.  Holy cow.  That’s weird.  You’ve been a great friend the past five years.  I’m going to miss our Hills parties and watching the Real World with you.   You’re the only person that understands my love for trashy music and trashy TV.   You’ve made my life a lot more interesting while I’ve been here.  We tend to get into trouble, but it’s been fun! 

·         Sarah O’Neal – I’m amazed at how God sees each situation and uses them to give us exactly what we need.  I’m so glad that we ended up rooming together sophomore year (and the years following), because I gained a best friend.  Thanks for the shopping trips, chocolate chip cookies, movie nights (that I slept through) and all the laughs we had.  And thanks for the many times you would just listen and be an encourager to me.  You are a great friend, and I have missed having you around very much this past year. 

·         Jacqueline Rose – You are a type of friend everyone needs!  No matter what, I know I can count on you to listen and not judge whatever messed up situation I am in.  And you ALWAYS keep your mouth shut!  Thank you lol.  Thanks for always being so encouraging and supportive of me.  I always appreciate your random notes of encouragement during the life’s most stressful times.  If you ever need to talk, don’t hesitate to call.  Or just call if you are bored.  Because I’ll probably want to talk, too haha.

·         Ryan Schultz – I just want to say thanks first for everything that you have done to better the music department at Olivet.  I am so glad that you held us to a higher standard and that you challenged us with music that actually made us practice!  Second, I want to say thanks for being such a great mentor in my life.  I’ve learned so much about music, leadership, teaching, and life in general from you.  I’m going to miss all those random talks in your office (“headaches,” as you like to call them).  And you make my life a bit more fun, so thanks for that, too J

·         Rebeckah Sterns – I sure am going to miss talking to you.  You always have such a level head about everything, especially when I am freaking out.  I love that I can talk to you for forever, about the same things, over and over and over, and you never complain.  You’re a great listener.  I think what I’m going to miss most about you is that you are so strong in your faith.  You’ve been such a great mentor to me in the past couple of years, and I will miss you very much.   I wish you and Randy a wonderful life together.   I’ll see you at the wedding!

·         Bethany and Andy Wright – What would I do without my life coach(es)?  You two have been one of the biggest blessings this semester!  I’m SOOO glad that we are friends. You both are always so encouraging to me in whatever new “challenge” life has thrown at me.  Your Christ-like character speaks volumes about the people you are and I appreciate your input to my life more than you know.  And I like your baby, too J

·         Patrick Wright – wow, buddy.  We’re something.  That’s for sure.  But I wouldn’t trade my experiences with you for anything.  You’ve made me laugh, and you’ve made me cry a few times, too.  But through everything, you’ve caused me to grow.  You’ve been a significant part of my life the past couple years, and I sincerely wish you happiness in whatever you choose to do and wherever you decide to go.  You’re my best friend, and I love you.  Very much.  Please, please, pleeeeease make good choices.   And you better call me from time to time, because if you don’t, wellll….. just call me ;)

And I'll put these memories on here so that just in case you are reading this and don't have a facebook, you can enjoy them :)

1.       Awful roommates.  And their fish, Keshit, or whatever his name was...

2.       Band Camp musical

3.       Bedtime stories

4.       Bidet

5.       Bipinbop

6.       Bowling.  On a Tuesday.  At 1:30 in the afternoon.

7.       Brass Stretches in the Pit

8.       Bridal Showers

9.       Chris Martin’s cough

10.   Conducting with Nostils…. If you know, you know…

11.   Conversations in the recruiting office

12.   Daily unappreciated phone calls…you know who you are.  And btw, you’re welcome!

13.   Dairy Queen Studio

14.   DALE CLEVENGER!!!

15.   Decorating after BWS

16.   Drum Major Sectionals ;)

17.   Family movie night/nap time

18.   Five for all Forever!

19.   GOBSTOPPERS!

20.   Hiding from brass consort

21.   I <3 Tommy H ;)

22.   I put my ones up here…

23.   Kendra’s ‘all-purpose’ scream

24.   Late night phone calls when Harmony projects are due

25.   Magic in the Rhine River

26.   Mean Girls Sorority.  HA!

27.   My brakes going out in Chicago

28.   Panera fund!

29.   P-B-An-GEL-a

30.   Picnic time J

31.   Pink Hair!

32.   Prof. Schultz’s office decorating

33.   Recital after parties

34.   Rest stop on I-80

35.   Rocks.  And More Rocks.

36.   Spaghetti, Grilled Sandwiches, Oreo Balls?

37.   SPLENDOR!!!

38.   Spray and Wash vs. Centipede

39.   Tears shed on the steps outside Larsen

40.   The Chops Dance

41.   The Family

42.   The fruit fly trap

43.   The Larsen Curse

44.   The stage/pit massacre

45.   TRIFECTA!!!!

46.   Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle…Dee.

47.   Walking around the church Parking Lot in Osco, IL. over and over and over

48.   Wonderful roommates J

49.   World Musics fun

50.   You’re a mess!

The Last (and Most Important) Lesson

I am officially done student teaching.  Today was my last day with the kids and it definitely broke my heart to leave them.  I’m excited for my own classroom, but I really will miss those kids though.   BUT they gave me some gifts to remember them by.  The 4^th graders made me going away cards and I now have my first poster to put on the wall of my office next year, made and signed by the kids in band.

As I look back on this semester, there definitely has been a lot of growth in me.  I came into the semester not wanting to be a teacher AT ALL.  I wanted to be a performance major and that was that.  But the kids definitely changed my mind.  Leaving today was so hard, as I am so attached to each and every one of them.  Even though sometimes they drive me CRAZY, I wouldn’t change it.  And now I am turning down grad school to be a teacher.  Who would have thought?!  I’ve learned a lot about myself, a lot about kids, a lot about my friends, and a lot about the world.

I was reminded today of what teaching is all about.  As I was giving my last goodbyes to the 4^th graders, a student that normally is a bit rebellious, occasionally disruptive and not well liked by many of the other teachers  (he’s a student that usually seems to be written off by teachers and other students.  Although I must admit, he is one of my favorites) came up and gave me a HUGE hug.  And he wouldn’t let go.  He kinda started crying a little bit.  And he finally let go and looked up and said “Miss Harris, I will reeeaallllly miss you!!”  And he gave me another giant hug.  And it hit me right then that THAT is what teaching is all about.  Reaching the kids that no one else will.  I felt like I made a difference in his life.  Two years down the road, he may not remember me or anything that happened in 4^th grade music class, but RIGHT NOW, in 2011, I was the encourager and supporter that he needed, and I’m glad that I could make his life a little better.  Even if it was only a half-hour, twice a week.  Teaching is about being Jesus to the people and students who may never have a chance to see Him.  It’s about showing His love to the kids, because they may not have anyone else who loves them.  It’s what life is about!

 I’m so thankful that I had the opportunity to be with these kids this semester!  Hopefully they learned something from me, because they sure did teach me a lot!